Diabetes Drone

30 Dec

drone

 

It looks like I was on the bad list. Again

Santa didn’t bring me a Drone for Christmas.

They can’t be that hard to fly. Right?…….

 

HCP -“Ok Mr Grumps. You’ve got what we call Droneabetes!”

Grumps – “What the hell is that?”

HCP – “Well. Your internal Drone has this fully automatic navigation system that flies it for you. It stays between these two levels. It won’t let you go too low so you don’t crash and it won’t let you go dangerously high either. And it gets better! It will still fly perfectly in high winds, avoid obstacles and even keep on course when you are asleep. Cool huh?”

Grumps – “Really cool. Why are you telling me this?….”

HCP – “You’ve got what we call Droneabetes!”

Grumps – “Yeh. You said. So is my Drone broken”

HCP – “Goodness no. But the navigation system is……… Now what’s the correct medical term?…..Oh yes. It’s fucked.”

Grumps – “Oh. Shit! So my Drone has crashed?”

HCP – “No. It’s flying a bit high. Ok. It’s stratospheric right now, but its ok, we can keep you here until we get it back into the range that you were before you blew a fuse. Errm, were diagnosed.”

Grumps – “Phew. That’s a relief. And then it will be working like it did before. Right?”

HCP – “Well. No. Sorry”

Grumps – “So how do we fix the navigation system?”

HCP – “Hang on… I know the answer to that one….. Yep. We don’t. Again. Sorry.”

Grumps – “Why not?”

HCP – “We don’t know how to yet”

Grumps – “When will you be able to?”

HCP – “Stop setting yourself up for cheap laughs on your blog Grumps….”

HCP – “We are not sure what causes it yet. Well not fully. You’ve blow a chip. But we are not 100% sure how. Or why. So if we replace the chip it could blow again. Anyway. Chips contain Carbs. I’ll make an appointment with your Dietician to explain that…”

Grumps – “Errm. Ok? So how will the Drone fly, stay in range and avoided all the variables that are thrown at it once I go home?

HCP – “You will have to do it manually”

Grumps – “That doesn’t sound like much fun!”

HCP – “Why not?”

Grumps – “I’m married. For years. And years. Manual is less fun. Trust me…..”

HCP – “Fair point. But it’s the only option.”

Grumps – “Oh. Bollocks. Guess I’ll have to then. Will you teach me how?”

HCP – “WHAT? The “Marriage bit???”

Grumps – “No! the other bit!”

HCP – “PHEW!”

HCP – “Yep. We will teach you the basics. Enough to get you started. Then you can go home”

Grumps – “Ok. Sounds easy enough……………………”

 

Live Long and Bolus.

Grumps.

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